A Sensitive Liberal's Guide to Life: How to Banter with Your by The Uptight Seattleite

By The Uptight Seattleite

within the culture of The reliable Preppy Handbook, The Uptight Seattleite is the Stephen Colbert of left-wing satire

the writer of the wildly well known Seattle Weekly suggestion column teaches american citizens all over the place the best way to include their internal leftist. Artfully balancing the cosmic with the cosmopolitan, the Uptight Seattleite (aka Adrian) delights his dependable readers each one week with snide perception on every little thing from type ("Can I pull off a Rasta beret?") to ear-bud etiquette. In A delicate Liberal's advisor to Life, he brings his savvy smugness to his widest viewers but, on themes equivalent to the hierarchy of transportation righteousness (what to do with the clunky outdated Subaru after procuring a Prius) and moral habit on the supermarket, together with how one can deal with the horror forgetting to deliver your reusable burlap sack.

different daily suggestion covers what to learn at the bus (Vonnegut as opposed to The Kite Runner as opposed to The Economist) and feasting on the buffet of variety, with information for capturing a condescending smile at those that don't understand how to take advantage of chopsticks. The Uptight Seattleite additionally is helping readers navigate the large matters, comparable to dependable parenting (which demands a mini-landfill package, ideal for the yard and able to be filled with environmentally unfriendly diapers). for each insecure liberal-and those that like to make enjoyable of them-the Uptight Seattleite deals us laughs from the head of political correctness.

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Additional resources for A Sensitive Liberal's Guide to Life: How to Banter with Your Barista, Hug Mindfully, and Relate to Friends Who Choose Kids Over Dogs

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The young ladies are out tonight. Yay! Let’s do shots with them. Come on. ” “Don’t be such a buzz-kill. ” The next morning: “Did anyone get the number of that bus? ” “Wow, Body, check out those jeans. ” “That’s the style. ” “Well, they’re comfortable, but they’re slim-fit. ” That night: “Yo, Justin Bieber, are you going to grow out your bangs too? ” “You can jog down the beach with her. ” “I’ve only been running on the treadmill. She does marathons. ” “Stop it. She’s a chick, damn it. ” During the run: “Are you OK?

Guess I should get that checked, huh? I don’t know. I kinda like the swelling. Makes me feel like I’m hung like my pit bull Otis. Come to think of it, my pecker’s sorta red like the one on Otis too. Hope I don’t start shitting on the rug the way he does, ha ha. I’m pretty smart. In fact, I almost made it through high school. Pop made me quit and go to work in his body shop. He said I was dumber than a lug nut. If that’s true then he’s dumber than a crescent wrench. Sorry, you probably don’t even know what them things are, beings that you’re so pretty and stuff.

One time we sucked them orange crumbs up into a hand-vac and then dumped them into a bowl of bacon fat. It was kind of like salty oatmeal dip. Not bad, if you ask me. Yer probably more of a turkey and salad eater though, as I can tell you ain’t fat like my sister Agnes. Damn, she fat. It don’t stop the boys from coming around though. She has a pet raccoon and four or five kids last time I counted. Not bad for eighteen, huh? Yep, we Millers is a fertile bunch. Make sure you write back to me quick.

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